…have slowly been becoming clear to me. I’m not kidding when I laugh about me being slow. I am slow. I frequently walk away from conversations with that fake “oh em gee hahahahaha SO FUNNY k gtg baii” AND THEN as I’m walking away, I get the joke, and actually appreciate it. Unless it’s anti-jokes. You gotta warn a girl.

So I’m just gonna let you guys (this is more for me, actually. I also forget things really easily) in on what I’ve “discovered”. I use that word “discovered” in the same way that Columbus “discovered” the West Indies. It was always there, and was already inhabited, but it was new to him, and the British.

1. I’m not a child anymore. I’m actually 18. The fact that I realize this a few (five to be exact) days before my half birthday means that it’s . So that means I gotta grow up. Become that Proverbs 31 woman. I need to make my own food. Buy my own clothes (doing that for a bit; I just don’t have the same tastes as my mom sometimes). Pay for my own insert things here. Be proactive. Take initiative. Clean my room (I’m actually taking a break from that right now). Be responsible for my own actions, whether that be my own or things that happen to me.

Happen to me? Yes. Because on the last day of finals and the end of my spring semester, I took my dad’s car that we share, and met my two friends at the nail salon as a little “hurrah we made it! let’s partay it’s summaaaahh” blowout. Not really a blowout but I’m paying for myself now. (see paragraph above). Anyways, after we enjoyed that, my friend points out a huge dent in my passenger side backseat door. As in, some idiot SUV driver sideswiped and ain’t no fundamental attribution error. Every time I see that dent, I mutter “idiot” and get really upset. It realigned the passenger front seat, also, knocking it a little curvy. I DIDN’T DO ANYTHING. But that was a hit and run, no insurance card. I’m still mad. And since I don’t curse, it musta been funny for my friends to hear my substitions. I said jerk about 10 times. YUP. JERK. Wow. And freaking? whoaaaaa. Joking aside, it really sucks that I now have to swallow the cost. So on my tasks as a growing up adult, I must research how to fix the dent, and the different costs. Ask for video surveillance. Go to the body shop. (not in the mall, the auto body shop (; )

I guess the reason why it took so long to realize these things is that I’ve been sheltered for so long. That’s one of the things I would want to do differently if God so blesses me to be a parent. Yes, I’d like to be authoritative, but I’d like to let this child get independent steadily but slowly. It sucks to …yeah.

It makes me think of when Paul talks about putting away childish things. ¹¹ When I was a child, I spoke as a child, I understood as a child, I thought as a child; but when I became a man, I put away childish things.

- 1 Corinthians 13:11 NKJV (biblegateway.com) Nuff said.

2. I cannot be like Bethany Mota, aka a fashion guru. Let’s face it, I suck at makeup. My half monolid situation doesn’t make it better, and I JUST realized today that foundation could be a blessing for my oily skin (thanks for the genes Dad). I tried curling my now just below my shoulder length hair, and it was a total fail on the right side. Like, my bangs are too short to be curled, even with the smallest curling iron I have. And then the top of my head was like flat even, because the curls didn’t start directly at the top.

That’s all for now. Thanks for listening.

>K